Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Comb-humming (back in my room)

Listening to Eva Cassidy and loving the way I've filled this room.

Here are the sand dollars still leaking sand--here are the necklaces I suspect of slight magic, pages torn from magazines with beautiful pictures, the stones from places that I love and postcards from places I've never seen--here are the hundreds of pounds of paper, the stories and poetry and theology and philosophy and all the courage and crying and adventure and whirling thoughts that I want just like this threatening to topple from their stacks and bury things, here is the dusty sunlit mirror, the huge hypochondriac potted plant, the bottles that I rinsed and filled with stolen flowers, here is the bottle of cardamom, the packet of saffron, the letters I'm writing and reading, the empty rice candy box, the notebooks and unraveling ribbons, here are the crumpled library receipts, the CD player and stuffed animals and other details in the corners that make up this layer of old adolescence under everything else, here are the newspapers I never finished, the alarm clock I ignore, the odd forgotten grocery item, the teacup full of loose change, the candles and incense I burned latelate at night, the crayons and broken colored pencils, the Christmas lights, the drawerful of old dance shoes...

I should probably clean my room, but I don't want to change the way things have settled. It's not tidy, but everything seems - just - right. To borrow an analogy from the book I'm reading now, it's like how a flower arrangement looks casual because of how much though was put into it. Do any of you ever feel that way about what looks like clutter, or is it just me?

11 comments:

  1. Beautiful description. And I feel the same way about my room. It's not exactly neat, but I know where everything is and I like it that way.

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  2. I feel precisely the same way. I'm trying to reduce the amount of "clutter" I have, but it's so difficult because most everything has a memory to go with it.

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  3. What is clutter to others is not clutter to me. What is called clutter to others is called "the perfect version of my room" to me. ;)

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  4. I know where all of my things are, even if it doesn't look like I should.

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  5. You're making me nostalgic...

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  6. I am a bit of a neat freak, but in my own way. Things can look cluttered to other people but it is really organized! I promise! Haha

    P.S. I’ve been meaning to ask, where is your header picture from?

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  7. Ballerina - I took it at my neighborhood's beach (in San Francisco).

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  8. Yeah. My room always looks like it needs to be cleaned (and honestly, it probably does) but I love it the way it is.

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  9. I really love this description. Esecially the one of the books. This just sounds exactly like you, and it makes me miss even the old room on 2East although I know that your room is world's away from that cold, sterile dorm room.

    That's how I feel about my own room... Clean may be nice, but clutter is life. And by that I mean real, breathing, loving, laughing, crying LIFE. A good thing.

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  10. Oh, I adore this description. And I feel the same way about my clutter.

    There's a book, called The Perfect Mess, which talks about how some people have more order in their mess than others have in their neatness, and actually how discoveries happen more often if you have some sort of mess. It's a great book, and a philosophy I pretty much espouse.

    xo,
    SL

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  11. This is so beautiful... I could just see everything unwinding as you spoke. Beautiful descriptions. :)

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