Ask again

A slow realization I've been having:

There's actually nothing inherently wrong with doing what you feel like. But there is a silly way and a wise way to do this.

Example: Say I am overloaded with homework, tired, and feeling down on myself. What I feel like doing is crawling  into bed — never mind the time of day — and passing out for a few hours to excuse myself from life and thinking and productivity.*

I will sometimes do just that. But then my sleep schedule gets messed up and I wake up more stressed, because I have less time, and I feel more frustrated with myself for procrastinating.

The NEW way (feelings are the new black!) involves asking myself once more, What do you really feel like doing?

("...Whatever I FEEL like. GOSH.")

So yes, I prod my brain a second time, and it responds with the real answer behind the desire to sleep and procrastinate and shut things out: What I really feel like doing is not being stressed and not hating myself for procrastinating. I want to feel calmer and happier, so that I don't feel the need to pull the covers over my head.

And then I figure out what would make me feel calmer and happier — e.g., laying out a plan of productivity for the rest of the day and making some green tea before attacking it — and I am free to do whatever that is.

Easy-peasy.


*note: for me, taking a nap is rarely a good idea, but of course naps can be just the right thing sometimes/for some people. just to be clear that I would never badmouth napping in general.