Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Boiling it all down

I felt tense and overflowing this morning, like I needed to scream, so I went for a run for the first time in nearly two months. It felt glorious. Why did I ever stop? My body loves it. It's not even running, just jogging, which sounds like the most boring dutiful form of exercise ever, but it's not, not for me; after all this time and confusion still my body loves it.

And I at home again, meditating in my sweat because it can't wait for after my shower. Because why do I form the thought in my head, I feel like screaming or I feel like crying? Listen, listen. Breathe / what is the shape of this energy? Where do I feel it, what does it feel like? To search for it in my body and having found it, listening to it with fiercest attention, with no intention of quelling it or pushing it away, no intention other than to listen well enough to know it for what it is, to let go and rest deep (quietly, honestly) in whatever I find it to be.

News? Love, temporary employment, credit cards, fear, Lana Del Rey, first ever smartphone.

Be well, my dears.

3 comments:

  1. Whenever I try to run, my body rebels on me. So I stick to walking. But I'm glad it works for you.

    Self-care is SO important.

    Sending some virtual cupcakes,

    xo,
    SL

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  2. credit cards?! ooh!

    ah, fear.

    shall the employment be temporary again? shall we run away to ireland/australia together.....? lauren, i think, would find it lovely to see the both of us/you again. ;)

    mmm, my body loves jogging (yes, that DOES sound like a boring verb/gerund, dun'it...?)/running, as well..... i think my body probably still loves bikram yoga, too, but that'll take me some more time to recover in order for me to flirt with it again.....

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  3. If only the weather were good enough here to go on a run at my whims. ::sigh:: And again I ask the question, why am I not out there with you, Hollzydear?

    What's the temporary job? And how's the smart phone treating you? What did you get??

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